Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of a hard conversation.
Yet, you wait for it to be easier.
It never gets easier.
You are wired to avoid discomfort.
You tell yourself you'll get to it later or when life settles down.
There is never the “right” time.
The beauty of looking backwards is you can remember how much relief you felt on the other side of these awkward, hard conversations.
It took me falling off a ladder and injuring myself to tell my boyfriend I might be gay. That was an uncomfortable and awkward conversation! And the relief I felt and the love I received after that hard conversation changed my life.
And the relief I felt and the love I received after that hard conversation changed my life.
It can be a major life change or it can be as ordinary as avoiding an awkward conversation about how something landed wrong with you in a meeting.
It could be the fear of the unknown reaction when you ask for a raise or a promotion.
Waiting doesn’t make it go away or dimmish it’s weight on you.
Oh, I get it.
I knew within months of starting work as a litigation attorney it wasn't what I was meant to do for the next 50 years.
I had great excuses.
I had massive student debt, had spent years and countless hours working towards this goal. How could I walk away?
Besides I was really good at it and it was both lucrative and prestigious. (Triple handcuffs)
Give it more time I told myself.
It will work better when I change firms.
Plain and simple, I resisted.
I refused to listen to the whispers inside my head.
Inside, I knew.
I distracted myself with work. Lots of work.
What would I do if I didn't practice law? How would I make money? What was I even trained to do besides practice law? Before this, I was a cocktail waitress. A really bad one too.
I felt stuck. Really stuck. Actually, I felt trapped.
Now, after many years, I know that stuck means I’m not being quiet enough to listen.
Slowing down enough to listen is a gift you give yourself.
What are you resisting?
What's a hard conversation you're resisting that once you have it, you'll feel tremendous relief?
Would you like support around that? Reach out and let’s have a conversation.
P.S. In the photo above I am in my personal trainer’s studio. Every week I lift to failure in a process called super slow. Can you feel the discomfort! My eyes are closed so that I only focus on the muscles being used for that lift. It’s a great system and has kept me injury free for 7+ years. If you want to learn more just reply to this message.
Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of discomfort.
Muscles will not grow without discomfort.